Loud music never gets the girl, because it always gets turned down.
They’re making a Barbie for burn victim kids. She’s called Barbie Q.
You’d think the Target Center would’ve been bombed by now.
“On opposite day my parents live in MY basement!” -nerds
When bleachers don’t have backs on them, they’re just stairs for fat wide people.
My friend said her baby started eating solids. Sweet, like what? Oh just bananas? Laaaaame. Call me when your baby starts eating fence posts and gold bars.