some things from my head.

If we used frisbees instead of plates we’d never have to do dishes. We could just finish eating and (shwoop- tosses frisbee out the window.)

i think roofies were invented because of a misunderstanding. And then the girl’s like “I wanted to be dated, not sedated!”

Wolves howl because they think owl’s are so funny: “HA OWL!”

Karate sounds like a way to describe a badass carrot.  this carrot are karate.

A unicorn is just a horny horse.

Beefy jerks eat beef jerky.

Whenever I fall asleep with my glasses on, my dreams are more sophisticated. Even the top hats are wearing top hats.

Beer pong is when i drink beer and play the first ever video game.

A lot of guy hippies look like male zeldas.

If someone on a bus ever yells “let me tell you something,” you can’t stop them from telling you something completely fucking crazy.

FACT: If a man really loves his skating rink, he gets a zamboni.

Mar 20, 2011 | Posted by in Posts | 0 comments

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