If we used frisbees instead of plates we’d never have to do dishes. We could just finish eating and (shwoop- tosses frisbee out the window.)
i think roofies were invented because of a misunderstanding. And then the girl’s like “I wanted to be dated, not sedated!”
Wolves howl because they think owl’s are so funny: “HA OWL!”
Karate sounds like a way to describe a badass carrot. this carrot are karate.
A unicorn is just a horny horse.
Beefy jerks eat beef jerky.
Whenever I fall asleep with my glasses on, my dreams are more sophisticated. Even the top hats are wearing top hats.
Beer pong is when i drink beer and play the first ever video game.
A lot of guy hippies look like male zeldas.
If someone on a bus ever yells “let me tell you something,” you can’t stop them from telling you something completely fucking crazy.
FACT: If a man really loves his skating rink, he gets a zamboni.